Preparing for a Debrief
Not everyone feels they need to prepare, and that's OK!
But if you want some guidance on how to get the most from your debrief, follow these steps:
Step 1 - Notes, or no notes?
You do not need your hospital notes to have a debrief.
Your notes provide an account of your pregnancy, birth, and postnatal period through the lens of healthcare workers.
The emotions we are unpacking are yours, and so hearing your experience and prioritising how you saw it is most beneficial to the process.
However, some people may wish to talk about specific parts of their notes and ask questions about certain events, and that is more than fine too.
Click here to read about submitting a free Subject Access Request to obtain a copy of your notes if this is something you would like to do.
Step 2 - Your Story
Before your debrief, it can be helpful to write down parts of your experience that you want to discuss. Some people find it helpful to write down their whole story, others might not write anything at all.
You can include how it made you feel, and/or how you feel about it now.
These notes can help guide you during your debrief to ensure you remember to talk about the things most important to you.
You can also send me this in advance, if you would like me to help keep you focused on specific things during the session.
Step 3 - Questions
We have all experienced leaving an appointment, getting home, and suddenly remembering a question you had forgotten to ask.
It can therefore be helpful to write down any questions you would like us to discuss before you come for your debrief.
You will have plenty of opportunity to also ask questions as they come to you, but a list can ensure you get the most from your session.
You are welcome to send me questions in advance, or wait until the session.
Step 4 - Your Needs
What do you want from your debrief?
The main aim of a debrief is to help you make progress.
This progress might come from starting to
unpack emotions and reframe your experience, to plan for the future, to understand your experience better, to gain new coping tools, all of that and more, or something else entirely.
There is no single correct answer, and it's ok to not know at all.
But if you do have something specific in mind, let me know and we can ensure we work on that as a priority.
I will also signpost you to other services if I feel you need support that I cannot provide.
Step 5 - Private Space
Many families who want a debrief are still in the early weeks, months, or years of parenthood. Others may not be. But regardless of your situation, it is important that we speak in a space that you feel comfortable in. This is why I usually meet you in your own home, where the space is well known to you. For online sessions, I also suggest you are in your own home.
Consider if you need to have friends or family help with childcare, particularly if you have younger children. However, I fully understand that this is not practical for everyone and we can discuss ways to work around this, especially if you're in the early days of parenthood and cannot be apart from your baby. Your needs and your child's needs always come first.
